Ode to My Freezer

To celebrate 28 days in a row of triple digit weather here in North Texas, I’ve decided to dedicate this post to my freezer, which bringeth forth all cold things. My current goal is to get skinny enough to actually climb up inside of my freezer and take a nap comfortably. Only 95 pounds to go and I’m IN. So far only my head can fit, but the best moments of the summer have been when my head is in that cold, cold freezer.

I’ve always preferred to eat fruit at room temperature. Lately, however, room temperature fruit slowly makes its way into the fridge and, inevitably, into my beloved freezer. Then into a smoothie. Then my mouth. After it’s all swallowed, it sits in a beautiful, cold lump in my belly until it melts and I have to start the process all over again. Sometimes I get too full for another smoothie, and that’s when my head goes in the freezer for a bit, usually until my eyes are good and dry. Then I shut my eyes and let my lips dry out. Then freezer time is over.

But somehow, the hot always comes back. It’s always there, waiting. If it wasn’t for my blessed freezer I would have no escape, no refuge. So here’s to you, freezer. Keep doin’ yo thang.

DELICIOUS STUFF MY FREEZER MAKES
(starting with my favorite and ending with my most favorite, recipes included)

Banana Soft Serve

Ingredients: Banana
Instructions: Freeze, blend.

Freezy Mango Delight

That's coconut on top, but I like to pretend it's snow.

Ingredients: Mango, coconut milk
Instructions: Freeze, blend.

VirgiVegan Pina Colada

Ingredients: Pineapple, coconut milk
Instructions: Blend the heck out of it. Die and go to heaven.

Okay, I realize I’m being kind of a smart aleck calling these “recipes”, but it’s literally impossible to make this difficult. Freeze your favorite fruits and blend them with your favorite milk. Sweetener is optional, straws are NOT. Smoothies make summer a little more bearable and a LOT more delicious. And don’t forget to thank your freezer for all of its hard work!

~Becky, a skinnyfat girl

DISCLAIMER: I’m not actually trying to lose 95 pounds. That was sarcasm.

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